A Christmas Story

Santa Claus had no idea
He’d left his list behind him,
Poor Rudolph had gone on the beer
And Santa couldn’t find him.

Then Santa crashed into a door,
And all the toys got muddled,
And, when he ‘woke with head so sore,
His mind had been befuddled.

His sleigh was wrecked beyond repair,
And so he robbed a tandem,
And off he cycled everywhere,
Delivering gifts at random.

He didn’t know whose toys were whose,
He couldn’t quite remember.
Reindeer should stay off the booze
Especially in December.

He dashed around from house to house
As fast as he could scooter,
And so you got a clockwork mouse,
And not a new computer.